Merge Records Hooked Us Up With This Awesome Titus Andronicus Prize Pack! You Know We’re Going To Make You Work For This, Right?
This is one serious prize pack! Included is a signed 7″, a signed poster, a Merge Records slip mat, and a test pressing of the Titus Andronicus album, “The Most Lamentable Tragedy.” We’re also throwing in a few tickets to their upcoming show, courtesy of Psyko Steve and The Rebel Lounge! We have a few tickets to give away, so even if you don’t win the big prize, you still have a good chance of winning tickets to the show!
So what ridiculous task do we require of you to win this prize? It would have to be something the band would appreciate… Judging by their name, it seems they have an appreciation for the writings of William Shakespeare, thus, most likely an appreciation for Elizabethan era writings in Iambic Pentameter! So, we’re going to want to hear a verse of two from you about your love for the band, Titus Andronicus, in your best Shakespearian style writing. Leave your entry in a comment below. We’ll go easy on you and make this a random drawing from anyone who enters. So, that means, it doesn’t have to be good!
Here’s an example:
By what task does Stinkweeds require
To obtain such a prize which your heart desires?
Only that of a short form Sonnet
Sounds easy enough, now get on it!
EDIT: HUNTER FYFFE IS THE WINNER OF OUR CONTEST!
Here’s his entry:
Mine attempt to win as ambitious
As this record with which thou doth tease us
And oh my fancy it would tickle,
To be awarded these songs of the great Patrick Stickles
For no band has ever before
Crafted such fine songs, about Civil War
Or written such impression
Of those combating debilitating depression
What form of word doth win the best
Vinyl from stores, loc’l and Southwest
Just enter? Nay! Weed o’ Stink gives tests!
To *do* or not, that is the quest
The last one? Fie! Beyond mine reach
I cannot stand that House of Beach
D’pression Cherry, what doth it teach?
That hazy dream pop? Not mine peach.
What moves my needles, soothes my loss
Punk impressions of The Boss!
Cries of Past Wars of Blue and Grey!
Monitor! Local Business! (The “Lanning Way”)!
The Bawdy Bard, what doest he say
“Titus Andronicus? Not mine fave T & A.”
There is nothing I want more than thee
From my favorite indie punk band from New Jersey
And it doesn’t even cost me
a cinch
To win this test pressing and seven inch
Hope that fate will be on my side
Or like Romeo and Juliet I will reside
Romeo, what ’tis I see
A contest of such poetry
That you would write, and not for me
But for Titus swag and a signed LP?
Juilet, you are the East
So hear me out at very least
This Titus swag of which thou speak’st
Is not mere crumbs left o’er some feast
The LP’s rare, a pressing test
The poster fine, the mat the best
And on this sword I swear our lives
The prize includes a 45!
O Romeo! You silly lad
Lines pathetic, rhymes so bad
Pray tell, what self-respecting wench
Would be impressed by a 7-inch?
Mine attempt to win as ambitious
As this record with which thou doth tease us
And oh my fancy it would tickle,
To be awarded these songs of the great Patrick Stickles
For no band has ever before
Crafted such fine songs, about Civil War
Or written such impression
Of those combating debilitating depression
I better to itself. And me! Is’t not abhor my Ears should bear. The winter’s grows near. With thee virtuous. Shall stay. And all girded up the summer sweet. like tire Treads on thee Vinyl. Thy outward desire thus shall Time’s fickle Winnings Prove.
Sonnet 72815 (a revised work of Sonnet 147: My love is as a fever, longing still)
My (want) is as a fever, “fired up”
For that which (no) longer (turneth on table),
Feeding on that which doth (preserve the vinyl),
Th’ uncertain sickly “…Airing of Grievances”,
My reason, from “the angry hour” to “a moral”,
Angry that a “more perfect union” is not kept,
Hath left me, and “I, Lost My Mind”
Desire is death, “The Most Lamentable Tragedy”.
“Dimed out”, I am, now reason is past care,
And still “fired up” with evermore unrest;
My thoughts and my discourse as “Stable Boys” are,
“Into the Void” the truth vainly expressed:
For I have sworn “thee Fall”, and thought thee bright,
Who art a “Fatal Flaw”, and as dark as night.
To hear the band of Titus A
Grow and change so far
Is to witness a band embrace
The Will and flux of time
Their sound while core and true
Still grasps for depth and truth
Commit thee to a craft
Which powers men to fight